


In Fever Dreams

by TwilightLegacy13



Category: The Shattered Realms Series - Cinda Williams Chima
Genre: Desvan - Ship, M/M, One Shot, Sickfic, The Shattered Realms Series, cinda williams chima
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-18
Updated: 2019-12-18
Packaged: 2021-02-25 21:13:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,163
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21852007
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TwilightLegacy13/pseuds/TwilightLegacy13
Summary: When Destin Karn gets sick, he tells exactly as many people as you'd expect - zero.  Before long, it becomes impossible to hide that the Ardenine spymaster is feverish and barely staying conscious.  A one-shot.
Relationships: Destin Karn/Evan Strangward
Comments: 10
Kudos: 28





	In Fever Dreams

**Author's Note:**

> This idea came to me out of nowhere a little bit ago, so I decided to write it. It takes place after Deathcaster, in that time period where Destin is still the spymaster and before he goes to Carthis with Evan. I hope you like it!
> 
> Content warnings: Serious illness (symptoms including high fever, headache, dizziness, and fatigue), mentions of traumatic flashbacks.

There were days when Destin Karn seriously regretted his decision to stay on as spymaster for the new king of Arden. Not because he hated working in the intelligence service, or because he didn't approve of Hal's regime—no, it was because with every passing day, the role seemed to be getting more permanent.

One of the things he'd insisted upon was that he would only keep the position until he and Evan left to go live in Carthis. That was still three months away, and he hadn't expected there to be so much work in such little time. He'd been training Harper Matelon to one day take his place, and though she was a natural at espionage, there was still much she had to learn. Not to mention the fact that he had been given an honorary seat on the king's council for his help in the war against Celestine, so he had meetings to attend as well.

A sudden knock on the door startled Destin from his thoughts. "What is it?" he called with not a little reluctance. He hadn't slept the night before and he wasn't looking forward to receiving yet another task.

"It's me," Harper said. "I need to talk to you."

Destin sighed and got up to open the door. "What is it? Did something go wrong with the Southern Islands job?"

"No, no," she reassured him. "I'm still working on that, but it's going smoothly so far and I'll keep you informed. Jocelyn asked me to tell you that she needs to meet with you as soon as possible."

" _As soon as possible_ like within a few days, or _as soon as possible_ like in five minutes?"

Harper shrugged. "She didn't sound like it was an emergency, but it did seem important. I'd say you should go soon."

"All right. I will." Destin closed his eyes briefly—he was starting to get a headache that he could tell was only going to get worse. "Thank you for telling me."

"Oh, and Hal wants to remind you that we all have to have dinner with the thanes tonight and you're expected to be there," she added.

Destin thanked her again and then left to go find Jocelyn Fournier. She would probably be in the servants' quarters as she usually was, sitting in the corner of her workshop with her sewing. It was useful to be friends with a seamstress, because she heard all gossip from the other servants and shared it with Destin whenever they met.

Sure enough, when he arrived in the servant's quarters he found her hunched over a handful of fabric and hemming the material with blue thread. Her lips were pursed and she wore an expression of intense concentration as she focused on the needle.

"Jocelyn," he said by way of greeting. "Harper said you needed to speak with me?"

She looked up and put away her sewing. "Destin, I didn't expect you to be here so soon. You must've come straightaway."

"Yes, I didn't know how important it would be." _Hopefully not important at all._

"It is important, but I wasn't expecting you to be here so fast," Jocelyn said with a chuckle. "Well, I don't now how reliable this is, but I overheard two of the maids talking about how the ambassador from Bruinswallow had a secret meeting with that We'enhaven official who was here a few weeks ago. As I said, I don't know how much of it is just a rumor, but if it _is_ true...that could be dangerous. I don't think it's worth risking, and—are you listening?"

Destin opened his eyes, not even aware of having closed them. He must be more exhausted than he'd thought. "Yes, of course I'm listening. Go on."

With a frown, Jocelyn kept talking. "In any case, if they're plotting something, then that could mean bad things for Arden. I would recommend some kind of action."

"Yes, I'll look into it." But he didn't want to look into it. He wanted to stop signing on for jobs that might take longer than the three months, especially right now when he was finding it strangely difficult to stay awake even though it was the early afternoon. "Thank you for telling me about it."

"It's what I do," she said lightly, but her eyes were scrutinizing as she stared at him. "Are you all right? You aren't acting the way you normally do."

Destin nodded in answer to her question, even if he wasn't quite sure. "I'm fine. I just have a lot to deal with, and this is important too. I'll keep you informed of the situation with We'enhaven and Bruinswallow."

"Thank you. I'll tell you if I hear anything else." Jocelyn took her sewing again and got back to work. "And take care of yourself."

"Of course I'm going to take care of myself," he scoffed as he left her work room and headed back to his own quarters. Jocelyn was a good friend, but she sometimes acted like Destin was her son who couldn't practice basic self-help. It could be frustrating.

By the time he got back to his room, Destin had already stumbled twice in the hallways and his headache was steadily getting worse. He was beginning to admit to himself that something might be wrong—a single sleepless night never left him feeling like this. He should know, after all. He was always too paranoid to get enough rest.

In an effort to ease his stress, he sat down to read Marina's letter before doing anything else. Opening the envelope, he found thick Tamric paper covered in the queen's elegant handwriting. It was probably a combination of things she'd heard from Tamron Court and all the things that had happened while they were separated.

Destin unfolded the paper and was about to start reading when a sudden chill came over him, probably caused by the open window. He hadn't expected the day to be so cold, especially given the typically warm climate of Arden.

He unsteadily rose to his feet and closed the window, then sat back down and picked up the letter again. He had only gotten a few sentences in before he realized he wasn't really understanding any of the words that Marina had written. Setting down the paper, he put his arms beneath his head on the table and closed his eyes—just for a moment, he told himself.

He woke to more knocking at his door, the sudden noise making him sit up with a start. "What is it, Harper?" he asked, realizing that the sun was setting outside his window. He had been asleep for that long?

"It's not Harper," came Evan's voice from the hall. "Can I come in?"

Destin blinked a few times to clear his vision and picked up the paper. "It's unlocked," he said.

The door opened and Evan came inside, finely dressed in the latest court's fashions. He didn't usually pay attention to which kinds of clothes were the most popular, but tonight all the thanes and their families would be at dinner and he probably wanted to make a good impression. Besides, Destin couldn't deny that the outfit looked good on him—the bright green fabric matched his eyes.

"Des, you're going to be late," he said, crossing over to sit down beside him. "And Hal specifically wants you there so you can talk to the thanes about the latest intelligence."

"I didn't know that was why," Destin answered, though Harper could have told him already for all he knew. He didn't seem to be good at paying attention today. "Can't that wait for a council meeting?"

Evan shrugged. "Apparently not. I don't make the rules. What are you reading?"

"A letter from Queen Marina, but you're right. We should probably go down to dinner."

"We can go down toge—Des, are you all right?" Evan asked anxiously as Destin rose to his feet and immediately leaned against the wall for support.

For a dizzying moment, it had seemed like the world was spinning around him and darkness was pressing in at the corners of his vision. After a few seconds, the sensation passed and he stood up straight again. "I'm fine," he said. "I just stood up too fast."

Evan still looked worried, but he let it be for now. He ran his fingers through his hair, lingering on the streaks of blue and silver, the colors striking and beautiful against the blond. "All right then. Let's go."

Destin's head was pounding as they walked down to the great hall, the pain seeming to intensify with every step, and closing his window earlier had evidently done nothing to fight the cold. He found himself wishing that he had dressed differently, which was ridiculous because they were indoors.

"Are you sure you're all right?" Evan asked him before they stepped into the great hall. "You look pale."

"I'm fine, Pirate," he insisted, even though a part of him was touched that Evan kept asking. "I'm just tired."

_That's all._

At this point he didn't even believe himself, especially since he was feeling less and less steady on his feet with every pace. Destin half-fell into his chair as a wave of lightheadedness suddenly came over him, gripping the edge of the table and taking a deep breath. Slowly, that feeling ebbed away, leaving him weak and still a little dizzy. He could make it through this one dinner. _Of course_ he could make it through this one dinner.

Dimly, he heard his name being repeated and turned to face the thane who was evidently trying to talk to him. "Lady Matelon here says you two are working on a job involving people in the Southern Islands?"

"What?" He'd heard the words, but comprehending them seemed impossible.

The thane frowned. What was his name? They'd talked to each other dozens of times, so it shouldn't be difficult to think of his name. What was it? "I said that Lady Matelon says you're working together on a project involving the Southern Islands."

Destin thought about this. It was true that he and Harper were doing just that, but he could not begin to imagine why this man would care. "Yes, but...we're collaborating _with_ people from the islands. Not against them." It was an important distinction.

"I see," the thane said, his knife scraping against the china plate as he cut his food. Destin winced—the sound shouldn't have seemed so loud, but it was oddly piercing and seemed to reverberate inside his skull.

Time passed, but he wasn't sure how much. He was distracted by the way the great hall looked—he couldn't place what was different about it, but he knew it wasn't the same. The lighting in the room, perhaps? Yes, that had to be it. And the ceiling hadn't always been so high…had it? He didn't think so. Why had it changed? Were they in a different place? It didn't make any sense.

Occasionally the other thanes tried to engage him in conversation, but Destin was barely even listening to his own answers. It was odd that none of the other Ardenines had said anything about the temperature, because this wasn't typical for the kingdom's climate, and it was _certainly_ odd that no one was remarking about how different the great hall looked.

Evan leaned over and whispered something. He couldn't make out all the words, but it was something about them leaving so Destin could rest. He wanted to protest, but couldn't find it in himself. "Fine," he managed, standing up.

Destin took a few stumbling steps toward the door, Evan beside him. He was so cold. He felt faint. The room spun around him. His vision went blurry and the room went dark, and then he was falling.

Even before they went into the great hall, Evan was having a hard time believing any of Destin's claims that nothing was wrong. Then he had been acting listless all throughout dinner, and often seemed to not realize that someone was talking to him until they repeated his name at least twice. Whenever someone asked about it, he merely said that he was exhausted and hadn't slept the night before.

He also kept closing his eyes and massaging his temples like he was in pain, which was growing steadily more worrisome for Evan, especially because Destin refused to talk about whatever he was going through.

"What did Jocelyn have to tell you?" Harper asked Destin after he finally finished talking to the thanes, stumbling over his words more than once. "It seemed like something important."

"It was, but...but I'll talk about it later. It sh-should stay confidential for now."

Evan frowned. This wasn't right. Destin didn't talk like this.

"Queen Marina also s-sent me a letter, and...and I'll show it to you later."

Was he shivering? It wasn't even cold inside the great hall—or outside of it, for that matter.

"I haven't read it y-yet, but I'm sure there's n-news from Tamron."

Destin was definitely shivering, his shoulders hunched and his hands shaking uncontrollably. That in itself was clearly not a good sign, but it was his eyes that frightened Evan. Those hazel eyes, normally so expressive and full of emotion, now looked lost and an ocean away.

"Destin, you need to rest," he whispered with finality, leaving no room for argument. "Come on, let's just excuse ourselves and I'll take you back to your room."

"Fine," he murmured back, probably because he knew that if he refused, Evan would not hesitate to make a scene. He pushed to his feet and Evan followed suit, not even having to give an explanation for why they were leaving—everyone had seen the state Destin was in, and Hal nodded as if to agree that he should go.

They only made it a few paces before Destin swayed on his feet and collapsed. Without thinking, Evan's arms shot out to catch him before he hit the floor, but it was difficult to support somebody who couldn't stand upright. He awkwardly adjusted his grip so that he could feel Destin's forehead while acting as a crutch.

"Why didn't you say something?" Evan demanded. He was burning up with fever. "How long have you been sick?"

"I...I don't know," he stammered, his head resting on Evan's shoulder. This, more so than anything else, was what made him realize it was serious. Normally, Destin would protest that he wasn't sick and he would manufacture any explanation for his actions other than blaming an illness, and he hated to admit that he didn't know something. Confessing to both in the same breath? It wasn't like him at all.

Hal and a few others from around the table immediately stood up and rushed to see what was wrong. "What happened? Is he conscious?"

"I'm not sure exactly what happened," Evan admitted frantically, his heart racing. "He just collapsed. And he's awake, but feverish. You saw how he was acting before, so I told him that he should get some rest, and...." He trailed off, giving a one-shouldered shrug of helplessness. "And I don't know what to do."

"Don't worry," Hal said, but he _looked_ worried. Anything that rendered Destin Karn too weak to stand was dangerous. "He's going to be all right."

It would have meant more to Evan if Hal had any idea what he was talking about. Or, for that matter, if anyone knew what was going on. "Are there any healers here?" he asked desperately, shifting his position so he could keep supporting Destin's weight.

"No competent ones," Hal replied. "I haven't had the time to hire suitable healers yet, but I know that Ash is in the city with Jenna. They haven't left since they came to ask about what their plans are for the Heartfang Mountains. We'll take him to the hospital wing, and Evan, you can run down and find Ash to bring him back."

"I don't want to leave Destin!" He was fully aware of the fact that he sounded hysterical.

Hal touched his shoulder reassuringly. "I know, but I'm in the middle of a discussion with the thanes that I can't abandon, and Ash won't believe a random servant who comes to get him. It has to be you."

It made sense, but he was afraid of what might happen while he was gone. He hated the idea of leaving the palace and trying to find Ash when they had no idea how much was at stake. Still…Hal was right, and the Fellsian prince was the best healer he knew.

"I promise I'll come right back, Des," Evan whispered. "I'm going to get you help."

"Pirate," Destin mumbled, the nickname barely intelligible.

_You're going to be all right. You're going to be all right. You're going to be all right._

"I'll come right back," Evan repeated, then awkwardly shrugged away from Destin and helped Hal support the spymaster instead. Without another word, before he could persuade himself to stay, he turned and left the palace as fast as he could to find Ash.

Luckily, he knew where the healer and Jenna were staying from when they had all met upon their arrival. Hal had wanted to give them a place to stay in the palace, but with so many diplomats and nobles currently in the capital, there simply hadn't been room. Ash and Jenna had insisted that the new king not bother himself with trying to be creative with making space, and had simply rented rooms in an Ardenscourt inn nearby to the palace grounds. It was a good thing that Evan had remembered the address.

It was simpler to get lost in the relatively unfamiliar city now that the sun had set, and his anxiety wasn't making the task any easier. When he finally managed to find the inn and get inside, he was out of breath and his mind was filled with possibilities of the things that could be going wrong right now.

He was just realizing that he didn't know the room number when Ash and Jenna came down the stairs into the common room, laughing about something one of them had said. _Thank the gods._ "Ash!" Evan exclaimed, pushing his way through the crowd to get closer. "You have to come to the—"

"Evan?" he asked, looking perplexed. "What are you doing here? What's wrong?"

"Destin's sick," he explained, the words pouring out of him with all the panic and worry he felt. "He was behaving strangely and he said it was just because he was tired, but he barely paid any attention at all to people at dinner and he kept tripping over his words, and he acted as though he had a bad headache. Then I realized he was shivering and…and I can't describe it, but he just didn't look right, so I said he should go and get some rest, and when he stood up he just collapsed. He had a high fever."

Ash was listening intently, nodding along. "Was he awake, or did he pass out?"

"He was awake, but he seemed out of it. Like he wasn't really sure of what was happening."

"Was he talking?"

"A little. His words were slurred."

"And his skin was hot to the touch?"

Evan nodded.

"I'll get my things right away," Ash said, heading back up the staircase without another word.

Jenna reached out and touched Evan's arm reassuringly. "He'll be all right," his half-sister told him simply. "People get sick all the time."

_Yes, but not Destin._

"You didn't see that look in his eyes," Evan replied, his mind replaying that moment right before Destin fell. "I know that it happens to everyone, but not usually this bad. His eyes were just so blank…so empty. Then when he collapsed, I was holding him up and he wasn't even trying to stand on his own, like he knew he couldn't, and you _know_ Destin—he'd never do something like that when there were people around."

He could tell that Jenna wanted to try and comfort him, but he could also tell that she, too, was concerned. The spymaster that all of Arden knew would never crumple to the floor because he couldn't walk, would never rest his head on Evan's shoulder publicly in a gesture of complete weakness.

Ash came back from upstairs holding his healer's kit and motioning for Evan to show him the way. "Let's go. I'm assuming he is in the palace?"

"Yes, Hal said they would bring him to the hospital wing," Evan answered as the three of them quickened their pace through the streets of Ardenscourt. "But—but I don't know where the hospital wing is."

"I do," Ash said. "Remember, I used to work there?"

He did, in fact, remember that Ash had used to work there, but it hadn't occurred to him in the moment.

It took longer than Evan liked for them to get back to the palace, but it had probably taken less time than he thought it did. Once they passed through the gates, Ash took the lead since he knew where the hospital wing was, and Evan and Jenna followed.

Ash stopped for a moment at the door and turned to Evan. "Don't panic. You can stay as I try to heal him, but if you're panicking, it will be distracting and you'll have to leave."

"I promise I won't panic."

_Just open the door already, healer. Who knows how much worse it's gotten while I was getting you? What could have happened?_

Ash raised his eyebrows as though he could read Evan's thoughts, and opened the door.

There was only one occupant of the hospital wing, which made sense given Hal's claims of having no healers, and Evan immediately rushed to his bedside. "I'm back, Des," he said, sitting down on the edge of the bed. "Ash is here. He's going to help you."

Destin opened his eyes, struggling to focus on Evan even though he was right in front of him. He reached out to take Evan's hand, gripping his fingers weakly. His hazel eyes were glassy from the fever, but they were also wide and afraid. "You…were g-gone," he whispered. Evan couldn't tell if it was a statement or a question, or if he was completely delirious at this point.

"I had to leave so I could get you help," Evan explained. "I—"

"Stand up, please," Ash said. "I need to get through."

Reluctantly, Evan stood and backed up to give the healer space. Ash opened his healer kit and put it down on the bedside table, and then placed his hand on Destin's forehead to check his temperature.

"How bad is it?" Evan asked at the same time as Harper Matelon asked if the spymaster was all right. He hadn't even realized that she was there, but now that he looked, he also saw another young woman he didn't know.

"It's…it's pretty bad," Ash admitted hesitantly. "He shouldn't have let it get this dangerous. I'm sure there's something I can do, but I'll have to use my magic to see what the problem is."

 _Destin, take decent care of yourself next time._ "How dangerous is 'dangerous'?"

Ash turned to face him, exasperation clear on every inch of his face. "To begin with, you promised you wouldn't panic. Second, if you let me do my job and take care of him, it won't be dangerous at all. Third, I need you three to tell me everything you've noticed about him that hasn't seemed exactly right while I'm doing this."

"I didn't notice anything until dinner," Harper began as Ash gripped his amulet. "But then he looked distracted and he wasn't really paying attention to anyone, and he kept stuttering. He was losing track of what he was saying halfway through the sentences."

"When he was talking to me earlier in the afternoon, something didn't seem normal," the other young woman said, her hands clasped in front of her. "He just looked so tired, and he almost fell asleep while we were having a conversation. It didn't seem like him."

Ash nodded and placed his hand on Destin's forehead again, his other hand cradling his serpent amulet. "Evan?"

"He seemed dizzy," Evan replied as he remembered the way Destin had leaned against the wall as soon as he stood up as though he needed the support. "And it looked like he had a headache. He was shivering and he looked like he was so lost. When he got up from the table, he just…fell, and you see what he's like now."

"Stop it," Ash muttered, and Evan blinked before he realized that the healer was talking to his patient. Destin was still trembling uncontrollably, murmuring something incomprehensible. "Stop trying to block my magic. I'm just trying to help."

If the situation weren't so serious, Evan would have laughed. It was so typical of him to resist a healer trying to save his life. Evan went around to the other side of the bed and grasped Destin's hand again, his palm much too hot. "He's not going to hurt you," Evan said soothingly. "Don't try to push him away, Des. Please let him try to heal you."

"Tarvos," Destin said softly, his eyes wide and glazed over. "Th-they're coming, Pirate. You have to escape." He was _definitely_ delirious.

"They aren't coming," Evan reassured him gently. "We're both safe, I promise. Just let Ash connect with you so you can get better. Can you do that?"

Destin's lips were dry and his breaths sounded shallow. He didn't answer, but Ash sighed in relief and muttered a thank-you to Evan, who took it that the magical pathway was clear.

 _Once this is over, I'm going to have a serious conversation with you about taking care of yourself. Ash himself said you shouldn't have let it get so dangerous. I_ asked _you what was wrong and you said you were just tired. You aren't invincible._

"Don't overexert yourself, Wolf," Jenna said. "Don't do what you did when you were healing me."

Ash didn't answer and kept holding his amulet firmly. Evan couldn't see what he was doing since the healing magic wasn't exactly visible, but he hoped it was working. Then, slowly, he began to notice a difference in Destin—his shivering beginning to slow, his eyes becoming clearer, his breaths coming deeper and more steadily. Finally, when he looked coherent again and there was no layer of confusion behind his eyes, Ash pulled away looking considerably paler and more drawn than he had before.

"Are you all right?" Jenna asked him as Evan leaned forward, asking the same thing of Destin.

"I'm fine," Ash said. He reached up and pressed his fingers into his temples briefly before taking a bottle out of his healer's kit. "This is just a natural and safe sedative that will put him to sleep so he can finish healing. All he needs now is rest."

Destin pushed himself up to a half-sitting position but almost immediately fell back down. The fever might be gone, but he was still weak. "I'm not drinking that," he protested.

"Please drink it, Des," Evan pleaded, tightening his grip on his hand. "When it comes to healing, he knows best."

Ash nodded in gratitude for his endorsement. "I've added a tincture that will help fight off the rest of the illness—all I could do was get rid of the fever so that your body was strong enough to heal itself, so you aren't back to normal yet. This will help, I promise."

With a sigh, Destin accepted the bottle and took a sip of the mixture. At Ash's orders and Evan's continued urging, he reluctantly drank the rest.

"Thank you," Ash said, looking surprised that his patient had really done it. "The sedative should start working in a few minutes. You aren't in any danger now, but next time you start to have those kinds of symptoms, get to a healer sooner. You put yourself in a risky situation, and you didn't have to. I'll come back in a few hours to check on you."

Destin rolled his eyes and the healer left, Jenna alongside him. Harper and the other young woman followed, leaving Evan alone with the spymaster who had been completely hallucinating only minutes ago.

"You're all right," Evan blurted out, overcome with relief. "I was so worried, but...you're all right." Without thinking, Evan leaned forward to kiss him.

Destin held up his hands and gently pushed him back. "Don't, Pirate. You'll get sick."

"You don't even know if it's contagious or not. Ash didn't say."

"Yes, well, I don't want you to find out the hard way," he said firmly. "And you don't want that either. Trust me."

Evan sat back reluctantly. It was a good point, but after being so worried about the possible outcomes, he wanted that kiss. The disappointment must have shown on his face, because Destin laughed and reached for his hand once again. "Pirate, as soon as I'm better and the risk isn't there anymore, I promise I will kiss you."

With a smile, Evan squeezed his fingers. "I'll hold you to it. Are you feeling tired? Is the sedative starting to work?"

"Maybe a little." Destin shrugged.

"How much do you remember?" Evan asked, thinking of the things he'd said while in the midst of fever dreams. "You were saying something about Tarvos."

Destin frowned in thought. "I remember everything up until we walked down to the great hall together. Then I can't remember anything else that actually happened. I thought we were back in Carthis on the day my father arrived, only this time I knew he would be coming and that he would kill you. I couldn't do anything about it. I thought I'd lost you."

 _You…were g-gone_ , he'd whispered. He had looked so scared.

"Oh, Destin," Evan murmured, and even though both of them knew it had been a nightmare, a hallucination, he leaned forward and they embraced tightly. "And I thought I might still lose _you_ when you collapsed getting up from dinner. The next time I ask you if you're all right, please don't lie and say you're fine. Please don't do that again."

"I won't," Destin promised. He blinked slowly and his eyes stayed closed for longer than they had to—the sedative was clearly starting to work.

Rain began to fall outside, cascading against the windowpanes in a way that was almost musical. Evan got up and put out the lamp on the bedside table, then sat back down and gently took Destin's hand again as his eyes began to flutter shut. "Good night, Des," Evan whispered.

He looked so young and peaceful in the caress of dreamless sleep.

**Author's Note:**

> Kudos and comments are always appreciated if you enjoyed it! You can find me on Tumblr at @twilightlegacy13.


End file.
